2014
04.07

On the Facebook page today Billy had posted a photo of Macho Man Randy Savage and MISQUOTED HIM LIKE A TURD BUCKET, but it made me think of old wrestlers from the 80′s and 90′s that most of us grew up with. I am obviously the first choice you are going to go to for wrestling facts and fun, but I do know a little bit about what I’m talking about. I ate Slim Jims.

GOD CREATED THE HEAVENS, HE CREATED THE EARTH! HE CREATED ALL THE HULKAMANIACS. THEN HE CREATED A SET OF 24-INCH PYTHONS, BROTHER, AND NOW I AM GOING TO CREATE A WRESTLING POST. LET’S GET READY TO RUMBLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! (right after I sift through tons of photos and come back from the coma that all of the wicked mustaches gave me).

jim duggan
Jim Duggan aka “Hacksaw”
- WWF & WCW
- “Hooo!”
- Survivor of kidney cancer
-Royal Rumble winner1988
- U-S-A
U-S-A
U-S-A!!

mark calawayMean Mark Calaway
-  aka”The Undertaker”
-WWF
- undefeated Wrestlemania
TURNED INTO THIS HORRIFYING CREATURE LATER IN HIS CAREER. SOMEONE GET MY MOM.
mark calaway 2

Mick-FoleyMick Foley aka “Mankind”
-Adorable. Clearly.
- Won 17 championships
- WCW & WWF
-Obtained 11 concussions
-Best selling author

natural_disastersThe Natural Disasters
-John Tenta aka “Earthquake”
-Fred Ottman aka “Typhoon”
- WWF
-Tag Team Chapions

randy savage“Macho Man” Randy Savage
- “Ooh Yeah!”
-Flying Elbow Drop
- Died 2011 from cardiac arrhythmia :(
- Won 20 championships
- WWF & WCW

rsteiner3Rick Steiner
-WCW & WWF
- Won 8 championships
-Wrestled for 20 years retiring in 2004
-Now a real estate agent and a member of his local school board (precious)

Well that happened. Remember when it was WWF and not WWE? Even I had a hard time getting used to calling it the WWE. Hulk Hogan was forever my favorite, but his facial hair doesn’t fit our requirements here at Beard Life. Only in our hearts.

Currently Listening: ALL THE 90′S ALTERNATIVE ON SPOTIFY

-Andrea B.

 

 

2014
03.21

The last few weeks have be ca-razy so I completely forgot to give you what you all don’t even read or pay attention to. To show you how much I appreciate you guys even though I feel like this is all for me and no one else, YOU ARE THIS WEEK’S FRENZY FRIDAY!  Yes.

I went through our wall of selfies you all slay at and chose 10 that I liked. AKA the first 10 that I scrolled by. My blog. My rules.

Cal Anders. Get your emotions in check, bro.


Will Petersen. You were chosen because you were the second photo I saw, and because of the sassy lady next to you. Sassy ladies are the only ladies.


Phillipe Bassist. I will let you know that I had to look back at your name 4 times to get the spelling right and I’m also not sure if your last name is the real deal, or that you slap a bass with your beard and make the panties drop. Because, yes.


Louis Duverbal. Aren’t we a fucking rebel?


Steve Shook. I.NEED.ALL.THE.PIZZA.PLEASE. I see you are from Pittsburgh so it’s possible to bring me endless pizza 4 lyfe.  Seriously, cheese me.


Bobby Funk. You, your beard, and your name are everything to me right now.

Chad Mommer. It was hard to choose between this photo and the one with the precious pup, but you look so happy and it’s making my day.


Charles Kennedy. CLICK.


Justin Brown. I need to go to the Alaskan hot springs now. This looks amazing and is one of the best photos we have been sent in a long.ass.time.

How do you all feel? Do you feel loved again? Mommy’s sorry. *tips back flask. flicks you all off*

Have a fun and safe weekend!

-Andrea B.

Currently Listening: Tijuana Panthers- Advice

2014
02.28

There are two things that happened today that have put me in a strange place. One: I found out that George Clooney has a new lady friend and it’s not me. Two: I have a sore throat. The only thing salvaging my Friday is the fact that I am going to see Pulp Fiction at the strange little sister that is the one screen movie theater in my neighborhood. Seriously you guys, it’s amazing.

That and today’s FF of course!

David CrossSource: http://joaocanziani.com/David-Cross

This is David Cross. If I have to go in depth about him and of his comedy achievements you are too young to be reading this blog and the potty mouth language that happens is not for your eyes.

I would, however,  like to just say a few things about this man. Mr. Show with Bob and David and his Shut Up You Fucking Baby comedy album. Yes, album. That means no visual stimulation. He is one of my favorite comics and makes me laugh so hard. I get great joy out of walking around and saying “answer ya telephone!” purely for my own amusement.

He is married to Amber Tamblyn who, for you ladies out there, was in those Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants flicks. That whole idea makes me cringe. Dirty ass jeans being passed around the world and not being washed. THINGS HAPPEN TO US WOMEN THAT MAKE IT NECESSARY TO WASH YOUR PANTS. NO SHARING. NO. STOP IT. THAT’S GROSS AS HELL. She does make me feel confident that one day I too can marry the older many of my dreams. So, fingers crossed!

Happy weekend my pets. I wish I could do this to all of you.

Currently Listening: Violent Femmes- Gone Daddy Gone

-Andrea B.

2014
02.14

So far my day (at 9:30 am) has consisted of waking up in a slight hazy depression thinking it was Monday, sliding down the sidewalk outside of my house while my neighbors watched, dumping snow into my shoe while scraping off my car, and now while sitting at my desk trying to block out the annoyance that sits 5 feet away from me; I slammed my coffee cup on my front tooth and almost threw myself on the floor and gave up for the day. I feel similarly to the significance of today. Valentine’s Day. A day where the card people and the flower people and the chocolate people and the Porn Hub people (it’s free all day today. Grab your tissues.) get together and throw their noses up and laugh, French like, at every person who is alone and only gets cards from their mother.

Today is a silly holiday because every man I to love seems to be in their 50′s or dead (See: George Clooney, Henry Rollins, Johnny Depp, Paul Newman, Gene Kelly, Elvis…), so my only choice really IS to have dinner for 1 and read that card from my mom, but for those of you who are the hopeless romantic and enjoy putting yourself out there only for this to happen I’m going to make this real special. Ish.

I don’t know about you, but nothing gets my motor running like the soft sounds of ZZ Top. That and a mashed potato bar all for me…and whiskey bouquets.

Ah yes, Gimme All Your Lovin: a tale of a boy coming into manhood. Nothing says love like frisky ladies in skin tight dresses, middle aged men, hot rods and gas stations. I am being 85% serious.

If I could only wrap myself up in Billy Gibbons beard and snuggle with him while he constructs a love song just for me, it would be the best V-Day ever. In my mind he constantly walks around with his Les Paul as if it is a third arm, and always wears sunglasses because he actually doesn’t have any eyeballs due to a tragic hat shopping incident. There he was, minding his own, looking for a new snazzy hat, and the entire display fell on to him. When the structure made contact with B. Gibbs, the metal leg came loose and struck his face taking out both of his eyes like Tonya Harding’s husband took out Nancy Kerrigan’s knees in the 1994 Winter Olympics. Educate yourselves, I will never forget it.

Be smart and safe  this Valentine’s Day.
I know I will. My boo and I will be having one hell of a time.

bloomingonion_zps14d2906cIsn’t he a stud?

Currently Listening: The Dominoes- Sixty-Minute Man

Love, Andrea B.