2015
01.14

dave grohl

Happy 46th birthday to Dave Grohl! Foo Fighters HBO special was amazing so thank you FF, and thank you Dave Grohl’s mom and dad for giving us Dave Grohl.

Currently Listening: Foo Fighters- Something from Nothing

-Andrea B.

2015
01.09

The digital age. It’s something we have all accepted as being “the now” more than being something of the future as if we were all starring as extras in Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century. I probably am aging myself with that example because I can clearly remember counting down the days with my neighbors until that movie premiered on the Disney Channel. To be honest, a lot of the things that I have always thought of as being creepy-future-Jetson-contraptions-from-hell are becoming reality. Have you see the BuzzFeed video of people trying out the helicopter that they control WITH THEIR BRAINS!? It scared the shit out of me. I’m not ready for this kind of technology. I just figured out how to use features on the IOS 8 update on my iPhone.

Speaking of iPhones, how many of you have used Tinder? One of the latest apps when it comes to online dating. No shame, I had it for approximately 8 days. That’s how many days it took for me to be get completely uncomfortable when the 1 of 7 people I swiped right for and matched them continuously called me “bro” and when I matched with my ex boyfriend, I just had had enough. I don’t need my failures flaunted in front of my face, dating app, you asshole. If you can hang with it, props to you, but I don’t even like half of the people I meet in real life, let alone on an app where the deciding factor is the bull shit lines they put in their bio and whether or not they are pointing, pouting, or throwing up “deuces” in their profile photo. Seriously guys, stop it, please.

The pick up lines some of the people on the app, male and female, cracks me up. We have all read our fair share of Tinder fails on the internet I am sure, but what everyone knows but can’t prove is the recycling of sweet talkin’ lines people use to be noticed. John Kershaw, the 28 year old creator of a new dating app called Bristlr, added a very necessary feature when trying to meet “honest” people on the internet. The feature alerts you when someone has copy and pasted the same sentence to you that they have used on someone else! OH HEY BUSTED UNCREATIVE B-HOLES!

According to his interview with the Washington Post, John said he is trying to use that feature as well as others to help the service be “subtly more open and honest.”. He also wants to keep his app, Bristlr, positive and genuine and I for one, find that refreshing when we live in a world that is based on judgement of appearances, hobbies, interests, and other superficial things. We are all guilty of it, just re-read my sentence above about my horrific Tinder experience.

OH! I completely left out the last part (no I didn’t, I’m saving the best for last). This app is a dating site for beard havers and the ones who like to touch the beards of the ones whom have! That’s right ladies and gentlemen (we don’t discriminate here at Beard Life. You do you boo boo), now there is a dating app that solely has row after row after row of bearded bliss ripe for the pickin’.

bristlr(source)

I may or may not check this out solely for investigative reporting reasons. Yea, that’s it….reporting.

Currently Listening: Creedence Clearwater Revival-Penthouse Pauper

-Andrea B.

2014
10.20

Last year I compiled a list of Halloween costumes you could pull off with a beard. A few of you have asked if another post would be made and after I thought about it for a while I decided, what the hell? Why not help other people figure out their Halloween costumes when you have no clue what you are going to be? That is how my brain works.

Khal Drogo Game of ThronesKhal Drogo- Shirtless hunk from Game of Thrones

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • Body
  • Face
  • Body
  • Black thick leather belt similar to a wrestling belt
  • Black body paint
  • Black eyeshadow and eyeliner
  • 5 hair ties for beard and hair
  • Black fake clip in pony tail (if your hair isn’t long)
  • Fake dagger
  • Fabric to wrap around arms
  • Fuzzy pants (I’m sure you can find them)

Other tips to pull this off: I literally know nothing about this show, but my friend Natalie is a big fan and suggested this one. My guess is smolder the hell out of everyone with your saucy eyes and get a manly strut down.

morgan freeman chain reactionMorgan Freeman in Chain Reaction

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • Black fedora
  • Round plastic framed tortoise shell glasses (check thrift stores and even some drug stores and pop out the lenses, it’s way more comfortable)
  • Plaid scarf
  • Casual blazer
  • Cigar
  • Gold pinky ring

Other tips to pull this off: Considering it’s Morgan Freeman, I just wish you good luck.

Rick Grimes the walking deadRick Grimes of The Walking Dead

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • Brown jacket with sheep’s wool lining (or a brown jacket in general)
  • Hair product to grease up your hair a bit
  • Plain tshirt and jeans
  • Fake blood
  • Boots

Other tips to pull this off: Wear some old clothing you don’t mind getting dirty and mess yourself up a bit. Take the fake blood and create a mark on your face that looks like you were in a battle with some zombs, yo. Carry your favorite fake zombie apocalypses weapon.

tyrese walking deadTyreese of the Walking Dead

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • Long sleeve cotton shirt
  • Jeans
  • Utility belt with the essentials (take the above photo for examples)
  • Gray beanie
  • Boots

Other tips to pull this off: We all know it’s not smart to be alone during the apocalypse, so considering Rick and Tyreese are chums again, this works out perfectly. Same tips for roughing up your clothing applies here as it does above.

richie tenenbaumRichie Tenenbaum of The Royal Tenenbaum’s

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • Striped sweatband
  • Tan suit
  • White scarf
  • Aviator type sunglasses
  • White socks
  • Brown loafers
  • Wrist sweat band
  •  Watch
  • White button up cotton shirt with blue collar. Similar to this

Other tips to pull this off: Feel free to carry around a sleeve of tennis balls or a tennis racket. Speak as if Wes Anderson is writing the script of your life.

TheMostInterestingManInTheWorld_1426Most Interesting Man In The World

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • Black suit
  • White dress shirt
  • Cigar
  • Black dress shoes
  • A 6 pack of Dos Equis

Other tips to pull this off: Be a man of few words, but when you do speak make it count. If you are trying to impress a special lady at the party, offer her one of your beers. Say nothing, but wink, remove the cap of her beer in front of her (seriously, she may think you put roofies in it otherwise and that shit isn’t fun. I may or may not have experience), and walk away smoothly. It may work, it may back fire. That’s the whole point of being The Most Interesting Man In The World…taking risks.

QuestloveQuestlove

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • Tshirt
  • Jeans
  • Tennis shoes
  • Drum sticks
  • A pick in your hair

Other tips to pull this off: Just play it cool boy, real cool (yes that was a West Side Story reference, sue me). It’s freaking Questlove for Quest sake! Also, if you wanted to irritate everyone at the party you are at, respond in appropriate The Roots lyrics for whatever situation you are in.

ray jackson bloodsportRay Jackson in Bloodsport

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • Harley Davidson t-shirt (hunt in your favorite thrift store, there will be numerous)
  • Denim jacket
  • Gray sweat pants

Other tips to pull this off: If you want to take the look to a different level, reference this photo from the movie here. Add a thick yellow sash and remove the jacket revealing your jacked arms in your cut off t-shirt and white wrist bands.

John LennonJohn Lennon (The Yoko years as I like to call it)

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • White suit. You know the pants he is wearing are white
  • If you don’t want to wear a suit, you can also wear something similar to this and people would totally get it. You know, because of the whole “bed-in” situation.
  • Small round glasses
  • British accent

Other tips to pull this off: Spread love and spread peace my brother. If you do choose to go the bed-in route, carry around one of their signs, like “Bed Peace”.

Robin-In-Jumanji-robin-williams-37487044-1920-1044Robin Williams in Jumanji when he first comes back from the jungle

WHAT YOU NEED:

  • If you have a handy person who can sew, I would probably say you could find a nice pattern that resembles a Peter Pan shirt and some simple brown/tan pants
  • Fake palm leaves glued together like a cape
  • Fake hunting knife
  • Palm leaf hat (made similarly to the cape)
  • Moccasins of some sort

Other tips to pull this off: Give yourself the ‘I am dirty because I have been in the jungle for 30 some odd years so don’t judge me, k guys?’ look. If you are a dad of two kids, you could dress them up as Judy and Peter and win the best dad award of the century.

This one was a bitter pill to swallow. RIP sweet prince.

 

Enjoy this list and hopefully it can help spark your creativity and imagination. I forget how hard this is until I decide to work on it. You have eleven days until Halloween and eleven days to send me thank you notes for all of my hard work.

Currently Listening: Jack White- Temporary Ground

-Andrea B.

2014
09.24

So you guys know how I’m real into MacGruber, right? Well, in one of my many nights of Google image searching MacGrubes in cargo shorts (not true), I came across this image of Will Forte.

will forteJason Merritt / Getty Images

Holy face fur, Allen Bishopman! You will probably remember him best looking like this on Saturday Night Live, but everyone should really drink this new look in and admire the cinnamon and sugar aspects of it all.

will forte 2Jason Merritt / Getty Images

I WILL gaze into those green gems you call eyes and build a fort(E) with you any day, MacGruber. That last sentence is proof I should never be in charge of writing coded messages that are sent out to save lives. That job can go to someone else. I will stick to reading books and quoting episodes of Will and Grace in real life as my after work hobbies.

Currently Listening: The Shitbirds- I Want You

-Andrea B.